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Why it is so hard to find a good man

This is the sad truth of the modern dating world: a quality guy is just so damn difficult to find these days. A girl could lower her standards and her expectations to great degrees and she could still come up feeling cheated and disappointed. Why is it so hard to find a quality man nowadays? The idea of the quality gentleman has indeed changed and standards have evolved as well.

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Why is it so hard to find a good woman?

Originally published on Paging Dr. NerdLove and republished here with their permission. When you have a belief about the collective entity known as WOMEN, everything you do involving women gets passed through the filter of those pre-existing beliefs. As a result, you often end up reacting to the entity in your head, rather than to the person right in front of you.

Going in the other direction, you can also end up putting people on pedestals, elevating them to levels of goodness and perfection.

Which is important because…. A key to being a good man is very simple: having respect for other people, for their perspectives, for their capabilities and for their lived experiences. The way we behave toward and treat others is based on our beliefs about them. Just as that false mental representation affects how we respond to people, so, too, does respect.

By not respecting them enough to listen — really listen — we end up shutting down avenues of communication that would otherwise make things easier on everybody. That important sense of understanding, that ability to actually relate, becomes key to being a good man because it allows actual empathy. Empathy is, literally, the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. Being a good man and having empathy for others means that sometimes you give up certain desires and behaviors because you recognize that it hurts other people.

Are you not doing the behavior that people are complaining about? Nobody expects you to be perfect. Even people who should seemingly know better will put their foot in it on occasion.

Being a good man means that you have to learn how to do this on your own. And yet men continue to expect women to do the emotional heavy lifting and teaching, much like expecting the fox to teach you how to tame it. The resources are out there if you stop and take the time to look for them. Read books by female authors with female protagonists — especially ones written for female audiences.

Interact with women strictly as friends and listen to their stories and experiences. Quit using Tumblr reblogs and fourth-or-fifth hand quotes and ideas attributed to Valerie Solanas or Andrea Dworkin as the definitions of what women think. Share Tweet 2K Shares. NerdLove dispenses love, sex and life advice for geeks, otaku, dweebs, poozers, nerds and the occasional neo-maxie-zoom-dweebie.

Making geeks sexier since Two people sit on a bench in the park, arguing. One of them is gesturing to the other, who has their face covered with their hands. Ever feel like trying to be a good man is almost impossible? What makes things difficult is when we miss the forest for the trees and make things much harder for ourselves in the process.

When we let that monolith occupy our minds, it becomes our de facto filter for interacting with others in reality. Found this article helpful? Help us keep publishing more like it by becoming a member! Comments Policy. Become an EF Member. Donate to EF. Cross-post Our Articles. Book a Speaker. Like Our Facebook Page. Follow Us On Instagram.

The Reason It’s So Hard to Find a Quality Man is THIS…

Finding a good man should be a unique experience for every woman and based on her personality. You must know what "good" means to you, decide where you enjoy meeting people, and simply relax. He's out there, waiting for your natural charm, beauty and intelligence. Everyone is different, and although most people will agree that a wide-reaching handful of generic qualities like "funny," "intelligent," and "honest" are "good," who wants to be generic when you're looking for Mr.

Originally published on Paging Dr. NerdLove and republished here with their permission.

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Why are good men so hard to find?

The subject who is truly loyal to the Chief Magistrate will neither advise nor submit to arbitrary measures. This article was published more than 2 years ago. Some information in it may no longer be current. Spend a little time with single women in their early to mids, and you'll be grateful you're not one of them. The relationship scene is even more dismal today than when I was their age. All the women want serious relationships that lead to marriage, but many of the men they meet do not. All too often a woman moves in with some guy, hoping they're on the road to somewhere. Two years later, he tells her he's not ready for marriage and kids just yet. But wait.

Why It Is So Hard To Find A Good Man? Solutions!

Since the very beginning of time, maintaining a relationship and dating were the toughest of things around for us mortals. Women always crib about the guy they are dating, sometimes the guy is too possessive, jealous and disrespecting, at other times he is a flirt who fools with your best friend and the worst of it all is the one who ignores them. Women and their non-stop complaining attitude will never end, they want to meet someone exciting, someone in whom they see a potential for a meaningful relationship yet they will nag all the time. In any relationship there has to be a boundary, when you respect that line of control it is easier to give space to the other person.

Well, I believe that this is a big question to ask yourself.

In pre-pubescent times, the game is often played girls vs. When the girls are in hunt mode, they emulate their future selves by trying to find where their perfect men are hiding. She wisely chooses the place where her crush on the opposing team will be most likely to find her. She may be young, but her instincts tell her how to work it.

Why Is A Good Man So Hard To Find?

We're herd animals… especially the female members of our species when it comes to their dating instincts. That's the conclusion one might reasonably draw from the results of a new study in press at the journal Human Nature. Evolutionary biologists, the authors point out, have in the past tended to characterize female mate selection essentially, which individual man a woman chooses to have sex with, given the realistic ancestral prospect of being impregnated by and dependent on him for the care of their mutual offspring as occurring in a sort of solitary vacuum.

Keep reading to learn more:. Who: You and me! Is it recorded for viewing later? Your email address will not be published. Don't subscribe All Replies to my comments Notify me of followup comments via e-mail.

Reasons It’s Actually Hard To Find A Good Man (And How to Find One Anyway)

Image Source: Shutterstock. Are all of the good men in hiding or are you the only one having trouble finding them? Every woman has experienced the struggle because it is hard to find a good man now more than ever. Now we want to know how you found your good man. Did you follow these rules? Share your story with us in the comment section.

Jun 15, - Any woman who has been on a date in the past few years has asked herself the question: “Why is it so hard to find a good man?” Date enough.

Even if we take our standards, expectations, and delusional hopes off the table and really look at the situation for what it is, we can clearly see that we are not to blame for the lack of good men. No, we have society who can take the blame for this one. Here are nine reasons.

9 Reasons Why A Quality Guy Is Hard To Find

By Stephanie Gutmann. As Dr. She describes the elimination of recess at school and notes that competition in school sports was discouraged via the Everybody-Gets-a-Trophy mentality.

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Comments: 3
  1. Ganris

    In it something is. I will know, many thanks for an explanation.

  2. Yozshurisar

    I have thought and have removed the message

  3. Vugore

    It is simply matchless :)

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